I woke up this morning to find my fingers had turned to lead. I stared at them, tapped the wall with them, rubbed them on my face, and stuck them in my mouth. I was then forced to conclude that my fingers had indeed turned into lead.
But even girls with lead fingers have to go to class. Packing my books took a little longer than usual because I had to deal with my new fingers, but I was eventually on my way. I spent most of psychology staring sadly at my highlighter and wishing I could use it, but I was unable to grasp it in my hand. In English I didn’t see the point in even trying so I stared at the ceiling while my teacher droned on about grammar and explained how to find symbolism in music videos. I spent my next two classes examining my fingers and thinking Why me? WHY ME?!?!?!?
Okay, okay, my fingers didn’t really turn into lead. But they felt as if they turned into lead so it comes to the same thing, really. And if I don’t feel like highlighting my textbook I don’t see why I should have to.
I felt like my fingers were made of lead because bananas are yellow, but also because I was tired. Being tired should be a good enough reason to skip school. The only thing worse than being tired is being dead, and people miss school for that, so it follows that tired people should miss school, too.
I wouldn’t have to miss school for being tired if there was anywhere on campus that sells caffeine. The way kids stay awake here is by slipping an ice cube down their backs and jumping around until it melts. This is neither as satisfying nor as delicious as Dr. Pepper. Don’t expect recovery when you won’t provide the medicine, campus officials. Sheesh.
I think I’ll write a professional letter with spray paint on the side of the building about this “no caffeine” issue, but it will have to wait for tomorrow because I need to shake out my fingers, comb my hair 100 times, ignore my messy room once again, and collapse into bed.